What About My Kids?

A Practical View

When a couple separates and/or prepares for divorce the question “what about the kids” is always asked. The overriding concern for parents and the court is the safety and welfare of the children.

Initially, there is the question of who will have custody of the children. More often than not, the parents will come to an agreement regarding custody. (Parenting time/visitation is another matter). If the parties have already separated and have an agreement in place, the Court will often not disturb the status quo, absent a new agreement between the parties.

Child Support

Child support is another significant concern when children are involved. New Jersey Court Rules provide child support guidelines based upon the income of the parents. A monthly amount of support is determined based upon both parents’ combined income. That amount is then apportioned between the parents for their respective child support obligation. Further specifics of child support and other factors considered in awarding support are determined in a case by case basis with the assistance of counsel.

Our real focus at this time is the impact a separation or divorce can have upon the children. Divorce is quite common with more than 50% of all marriages being legally terminated. It is no longer unusual for a child to have parents who are divorced or who may never have married. Fortunately, in the vast majority of cases, the children are quite resilient and adapt to the ever changing household environment.

Behavioral Problems with Children and Divorce

Regrettably, there are instances of juvenile delinquency and “acting out” which take place regardless of the parents’ residence or marital status. When the Family Court cannot resolve issues relating to the specific problems of a child, the matter may be referred to the Juvenile Court or the Municipal Courts.

Common offenses committed by juveniles include theft, substance abuse and assault. Whether it is the use or possession of drugs or a friendly dispute turned into an altercation, this firm can provide the experienced representation required to minimize the impact on the juvenile and your family.

There is often little comfort in knowing that there are many juveniles who commit a variety of offenses. Comfort comes however, in knowing that your counsel can provide the knowledge and experience necessary to protect your child to the greatest extent possible.

Municipal Court matters such as motor vehicle offenses, DUI and drug related offenses are handled outside of the regular divorce process. Our experience can assess the situation and provide well reasoned counsel, in order to achieve a positive result. Juveniles cannot represent themselves, pro se, and therefore, you will often be required to retain legal counsel. Regardless of the municipal violation or the location of the offense, you can be confident of our experience and dedication to your matter and your individual needs.

Some juvenile offenses will be referred to Superior Court. Depending upon the nature of the event or the seriousness of the charges, the Superior Court will hear many juvenile matters. Typically, a juvenile record will be sealed and the specifics of the charges will not be made known to the public throughout your child’s life. We have represented clients in Superior Court in Ocean County, Monmouth County and Atlantic Counties. Our Municipal Court representation includes the towns of Toms River, Point Pleasant, Manahawkin, Seaside Heights and Jackson in Ocean County. In Monmouth County, we have similarly appeared in many municipalities: Freehold, Asbury Park, Howell, Red Bank, Neptune and throughout the area. Municipal Court representation for our clients has been provided throughout the State of New Jersey.

Not all “acting out” by juveniles are matters that must be handled by the courts. There are many opportunities for the children and parents to receive counseling to help everyone cope and adjust to the changes ahead.

Counseling can be of assistance to the separating parents to assist them in the divorce. It is not always easy to recognize and respond to the emotions you are having and how this will impact your behavior. This assistance is also helpful in understanding what your partner and your child is going through. Everyone handles these times of turmoil differently and a qualified counselor can give your particular circumstances the time and attention needed to cope with the emotional impact of a separation or divorce.